I have recently realised that before children, I really had no idea and had this naive, idealistic view about motherhood. Others told me things, like how sleep deprived they were and I just thought that won't be me, my children will be in a good routine, if I only knew!
The issue now is that I have come back to work into a young team that are in the BC zone. So why should I be surprised when colleagues have commented on me being sick yet again and analysed why, 'hmm maybe, if I got more sleep (which I am extremely lacking) and didn't have two small children (or two Petri dishes for disease) in childcare, I would be feeling a lot better!!
Returning to work and taking in comments made to me, really hit it home for me what I used to think - all these myths and others busted very quickly! Here are just several but there are many more......
1. In general I will be calm, serene, in control, cook lovely meals and bake, do learning games and craft with my children at all times, minimal TV - mantra, serenity now doesn't work!
2. I would breeze back into work after maternity leave, maybe even full time, I mean, why not Men do it - women are different - I really struggled after both children and I work part time – (actually sometimes I think the part time gig is harder but more on that later)
3. If I follow Gina Fords routines in The New Contented Little Baby Book my children will be sleeping through by three months and I will never look back, none of this sleep deprivation for me - routine lasted from week six to seven with my first, gave up after kept getting mastitis and my little girl just wouldn't conform, really stressed me out - with my second child didn't even bother.
4. Again on the sleep - sleep training how hard could it be and if worse comes to worse I will do it and all will be fixed - it is hard, very hard and they don't tell you, how it can break your heart, I was crying too, plus even after putting in the hard yards worked for a month and then stopped - my daughter now nearly four still has bad nights
5. Breast is best - I will breastfeed until I go back to work - fairly much did with my first through four bouts of mastitis (what was I thinking) but with the second he never seemed to get enough, unsettled and I suffered postnatal - all this improved once I moved to the bottle at four months - so no, breast is not always best! Both B and I suffered postnatal (B after her first and me with the second) which is something we will talk about in a later post – but believe me from this perspective bottle is best!
6. No dummies - this mantra lasted all of four days with my first and she had it until she was three
7. And one on top of these for B - I will never let my children eat hot chips when I go out or suck on the sugar sticks ( I now only go to cafes with sugar sticks so I can have five minutes of peace!).....
And following on from the comment above, I could never have imagined how little sleep and how many bugs I would get in the first six months after returning to work –having a child starting childcare. Lets just say I had never had gastro in my life and then got it four times within the first year of my daughter being in childcare.(B - I also view gastro as part of my dieting regime!!!! All I need is a good bout to kick start this diet!) With my son it has been the chest colds. Fun, fun, fun!
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